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You Are Probably Addicted to MMA

@hoboseal
Nov 5, 2015
5 min read

Remember that time, long ago, where you were head over heels over that pretty girl? You went after her like a horse chasing a carrot, and your whole life in existance revolved around her beautiful eyes and mesmerising smile. When the time was ripe, you dropped the question on her, and then, the next thing you know, you got inducted into the friendzone.

Fast forward; you got your heart brokened, and now you found a new love: MMA. It made you rediscover yourself, gained confidence, and presently, you eat, sleep, breathe and live in the world of Mixed Martial Arts.

After some time, you receive the title of "Hardcore" in the gym. People start asking you for advice in sparring, in training, in what brands of rashguard to buy, what Muay Thai shorts design is popular, what soap to use, what food to eat, etc. You become "The Guru". You start being a consultant, and you start offering tips on every single thing that has MMA tagged to it.

Like every hobby or passion, there's always a step too far. When passion evolves into an obsession, there will be tell tale signs that you're probably too far in. Don't get me wrong, it is good to work hard, strive for improvement, and strive for perfection. But like using a whetstone sharpening a blade, overdoing it will only make the blade blunt. Here are 6 signs that you probably need therapy.

1. Staying in the gym for ridiculous amount of time.

The first class starts at 7am. You wake up at 530am, wash up, face the mirrior and shout at yourself "LET'S DO THIS". The class starts at 7am, you reach the gym at 630am, still repeating the words "LET'S DO THIS" to yourself. You go through the first class, sweat bucket loads, and joined the rest for cool downs.

As the others shower and get ready for work/school/life, you tell the coach that you'd be doing the next 9am class as well. The coach is impressed by your commitment. You go through the next class, same words ringing through your head. The class is done, the rest shower and change into their dry clothes. You fill up your protein and aminos and what nots, take a quick bite, and get ready for the next 1130am class.

The next thing the coaches know, you appear again in the evening. Worse, you took an afternoon nap in the gym, woke up at 430pm and went for a jog. You then complete the full set of classes in the whole evening till late night. Finally at 11pm you bid Onyx goodbye and left for home.

The next morning, at 530am you face the mirror, and tell yourself "LET'S DO THIS".

If this sounds familiar to you, you need therapy. And you need to find balance. Even professionals don't train this much. Find some friends, go out for coffee, watch a movie.

PS: The highest record set was 4 classes in a day.

2. Your entire wardrobe is MMA brands.

Your friends called you out for movie at JEM. You reluctantly agreed and get changed to go. You see your wardrobe and decided that you're gonna wear that limited edition Anderson Silva walkout tee matched with a Hayabusa MMA shorts.

Watch #2 - The "Sponsored" Fighter

Your parents nag at you to get changed get going. You open your wardrobe, and decided to go for something more formal. You picked out your favourite long sleeve Springroll rashguard, and put your ETG tee over it. You looked at that favourite pair of Venum MMA shorts, but decided that it'll be better to put on a long pants. You then wore your black Shoyoroll Gi pants. You parents continue to shout at you and tell you that you are all going to be late for your cousin's wedding.

Your school/working bag is from Jaco. Every class at the gym is like a Paris fashion show for you. A different MMA pants every class, a different Gi colour for every rolling session. The hard truth is that even if you have different coloured Gis, your belt colour is the same. While it is important to look/feel good about your MMA journey, it's another thing altogether if you do not learn the skills and adopt the correct mindset. Martial arts are humble by nature. I know of fighters who trained and fought without having a single pair of Muay Thai shorts.

3. You surf MMA 24/7.

Your world of information is filled only with MMA. Headline news to you will be the announcement of fight cards. Finance news to you will be the fight purses of UFC fighters. Business news to you are the contracts signed between promotions. Your CNN and BBC are mmajunkie.com and mmaweekly.com. You've probably watched the first 47 pages of the search results on Youtube for 'MMA'.

But we are all once or perhaps still a fanboy/girl at heart. But keep it in check, there are many other things that happen out there all the time. If you really need a distraction, try WWE videos.

4. You dreamt that you were in a UFC Main Event Fight.

For a few times in a month, you will wake up in the middle of the night shouting NOOOOO, and start sobbing because it was a dream that you didn't want to wake up from. In the dream, the lights dimmed, your favourite music was playing, got the go ahead from the event organisers to walk/run/jog to the cage. You enter, and you see Bruce Buffer announcing your name. Across the cage, you stare eye to eye with the UFC Middle Weight Champion, you tell yourself that the belt is yours.

The bell rings, you wake up.

Stop dreaming, and start training. Who knows, your dream might come true.

5. You complain non-stop that you don't have a girlfriend. #foreveralone

And why would that be the case? Because you're too obsessed over MMA! Sure, it's cool to do martial arts, girls feel safe around you, you are fit, disciplined and matured from the values inculcated into you. But like an annoying Army recruit that has just completed his field camp that goes on endlessly about the turn-out and the tekan session, if you can't stop talking about MMA, you are just another annoying dude.

Seek balance, and seek harmony, otherwise it is very likely that your next Valentine's date is going to be the punching bag, or Maddox the training buddy.

6. You start shadow boxing in public.

This is by far, the worst and absolute sin that you can ever commit to show your obsession with MMA. You start to jab cross while waiting for food at the kopitiam. In the train, you start to bob and weave around the handles and railings. All these are just actions waiting to be STOMP-ed. How will you show up in the gym with your head high ever again......